Taylor-LeighI would argue to say that everyone is a caregiver because everyone is (hopefully) taking care of themselves.
However, I’m talking about another kind of caregiver. I’m not even talking about parents, because that’s what the mommy blogs are for. I’m talking about the kind that voluntarily takes care of another person or people, whether it be for a job or for a family member.
Caregiving is a sort of act. In addition to taking care of ourself, we are also taking care of another human being, sometimes twice our own size. That is double care.
What I mean by caregiving being an act, is that we are ON all the time. If you live in the house with your loved one like I do, there is no clocking out. Whether my loved one wakes up at 3am or 3pm, I am responsible for her basic needs and wants, often without any regard to my own.
Sometimes I consider caregiving to be performative. If I’m not in the mood, I have to fake it ’til I make it, but putting on a happy face and squeezing the energy out of me so my loved one will be happy.
While going to the bathroom is second nature for myself, my loved one can’t go by herself. The same goes for meals, for bathing, for exercises, and for entertainment. I do everything twice, once for myself and once, or multiple times a day actually, for my loved one.
Because the output it more, my rest and rejuvenation needs are more. The tricky part is finding the time and space to give myself the care I need. The time and space to turn myself OFF.
For me this looks like taking advantage of the opportunity to leave the house. Engaging in activities that make me feel good from the inside out. That fill me up rather than drain my energy.
If I need a reboot without leaving the house, I can do a yoga pose or a few, have a dance party (my loved one might even enjoy that), take some deep breaths, journal, or eat my meal in another room.
It means setting a time to talk to a therapist or phone a friend, having a date night with my partner, and getting another caregiver to take over my duties for a few hours.
It means asking for help and doing what I know fills my own personal cup. It looks different for everyone. It may look like washing your face before tending to your care.
Take care of yourself as you would take care of another person.
Basically what im saying is….TAKE as much self-care as you can get! DONT feel bad about it. You NEED it and you DESERVE it.
Thats about it. Have a nice day and go wash your face.